The 11 Intentions: The “Why” of Ritual (Part 2 of 3)

To briefly review, we always have a specific goal for a ritual. There may be more than one goal, but there must be at least one. I believe we have 11 Intentions (goals or purposes) for ritual. Below is a brief description of each Intention. The first six are reviewed here and the remaining five are in the next post. 

Ritual of Healing
When we feel broken, abused, fragmented, and shattered, we need healing. Our state of brokenness and pain may have arisen from physical or psychological trauma, spiritual wounds, neglect, abandonment, and other causes. In short, when we feel wounded we need healing. Rituals of Healing help bring about reconstruction, rehabilitation, hope, personal acceptance, and mending. They can help us restore ourselves and our key relationships. 

Ritual of Renewal
When we feel empty, worn out, hopeless, and weary we need renewal. We may be stuck in a rut and suffering from burnout, exhaustion as well as overwhelmed by the negative things. Rituals of Renewal help us reset, revitalize our body, mind, and spirit, gain a new perspective, and regain a sense of gratitude. They may include small daily moments of restoration or life-changing sell-everything-and-move types of personal transformation. 

Ritual of Reconciliation
Whether we have hurt someone else or they have hurt us, Rituals of Reconciliation can help when we feel betrayed or neglected, or when we are seeking forgiveness. Rituals of Reconciliation often involve situations where we have been cut off or abandoned and we are left feeling unfinished or incomplete. These rituals help us find resolution, harmony, and integration. 

Ritual of Beginnings
There are many phases of life and new starts that deserve to be acknowledged and celebrated. As these new beginnings approach, we may feel unprepared, reluctant, or unqualified. Examples may include starting a new job, beginning a new romantic relationship, moving to a new place, starting a new vocational journey, or simply beginning the day. Similarly, many of our new beginnings are only known to us and we may feel unacknowledged or ignored. Rituals of Beginning help acknowledge the hope and fears that may go along with new starts. 

Ritual of Transitions
Life is full of threshold moments – times most accurately described as both a beginning and an end. Many of these moments are bittersweet, and we often feel a mixture of excitement, joy, sadness, and overwhelm. Weddings, graduation, and retirement are common transition examples. In each of these situations we are saying goodbye to one chapter of our life and hello to the next chapter, etc. But many transitions are private moments that signify changes in our identity. In smaller, daily moments we use rituals to more smoothly transition from one activity to another. Rituals of Transition help us acknowledge the poignant emotions that are a part of big life-changing events, but they can also help us navigate the small daily transitions. 

Ritual of Loss Integration
Our lives are full of loss. Certainly there is the big one – the death of a loved one. But we also grieve the end of our favorite TV program, the breakup of our favorite band, and when the restaurant chain discontinues our favorite dish. Losses can leave us wrestling with our own mortality, resurface previous losses, struggling with how to acknowledge our grief, experiencing the pain of separation, and feeling alone. What do we hope to get out of grief rituals? After all, it is unrealistic to replace our grief with happiness or contentment – or worse, to forget. Rituals of Loss Integration help us find meaning after bereavement. When loss rips the fabric of our lives, ritual can help us re-weave our connections to them. These rituals help us create a link so we can remember them but also continue living.

In future posts, I will explore each of the 11 Intentions in detail. In the forthcoming book, I will devote a chapter to each Intention.